I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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