THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
