Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
