you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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