Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
