weddingsv make me drug and hornr
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
