i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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