id be glad to
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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