matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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