Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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