I feel great
I just peed on a car
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
well you can't waste a boner
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
