If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
