i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
