That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
