Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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