she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
