Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
