put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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