Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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