I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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