do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
