Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
