Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
You ate ashes out of my bong
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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