Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
he shaved USA in his pubs
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
it was like eating out sand paper
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize
