you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize