It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize