and you said cock pushups were impossible
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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