I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize