My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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