You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize