Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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