Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
