Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize