What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
