can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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