Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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