Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
