It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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