I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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