I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?