it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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