I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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