apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize