whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I love you. Go after that dick
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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