Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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