I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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