I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He shit in the fireplace
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
