I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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