Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
