When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize